2 sides of Adoption

Adoption has good things that attract parents and society to choose adoption. unfortunately people fail to acknowledge the dark side of adoption.

Like everything else there are two sides to a topic. Adoption has a good side and yes a darkside. On the good side for most people a good side but it is not happening as much as people want to believe. They don't see the total picture only what they want to hear and see. They see children alike and not the mom They are wanting their children belong. Genuine hugs. Family playing together. False assumptions that you are family and think nothing about it and are oblivious to your pain. On the down side There is Secrecy, lies and covering up the truth. When people hear about your issues and DEPRESSION and flaws in being adopted, it not uncommon for people to change the subject, gas light you, shame you, make you feel not important by friends and relatives. You might also be led to think that It couldn't be that bad. It appears you are super sensitive. I think the silent treatment is about the worst thing that a family member can do to an adoptee. It caused me emotional stress, My emotions went out of whack. I could not settle down. I became fearful I experienced this when I communicated with my mother I wanted to have my identity in the open. I received a registered letter threatening me legal action if I mentioned my identity to a ralative. I was to Stop talking to people. I was upset. The silent treatment is passive aggressive and emotionally abusive. It is used to used to punish and regain control of a person. My mother did this to me. You begin to think the problem is with you. This is what happens when you want your identity to be out in the open . I experienced this first hand. I was given the silent treatment. There were and Scare tactics like threats of legal action . When a birth parent has you silent they have you quiet and they sigh a sigh of relief. But if the person are Cornered they begin to talk to you. There is a undercurrent and body language of watch it. I have also had heard, I don't think that this was done on purpose by keeping your adoption a secret. When adoptees speak out how we are, I am, we are harmed by being Belittled and silenced. The list continues. I have stated my opinion and impressions of adoption as a result of being a adoptee. Despite the negative effects the part in my adoption experience is My mom dad let me know they loved. I didn't always see it growing up with issues that I face. Now that I am healing and my identity has surfaced and is out in the open I am able to see my parents in a good way. When I speak out as a adoptee how we are I am, we are Belittled and silenced. What I am thankful for? Good question!