Watch for Triggers

Abandonment issues

A couple of weeks ago my friends move forward from Cambridge to Hamilton.

Another friend of mine (mental health counselor) reminded me to be aware of being triggered.

Adoptees have to be aware of the pitfalls of Abandonment.

I had tried to keep a stiff upper lip. I recognized that yes I was feeling abandoned.

I was able to communicate with my friend Michelle what another friend

reminded me of.

My friend Lisa reminded me to communicate what I needed to ward off the anxiety I struggle with.

I also struggle with wanting people

to like me. I tend to be a people pleaser.

I made a statement recently that I am not going to worry about whether people understand or like me.

I am not going to become a carbon copy.

My identity has been identified by my family. My health.

My identity comes from God.

I will stay close to

those who are my core support people.

The others well I have had to turn around and walk away.

These people are Not

worth worrying about. I need to be healthy.

I am working on my people pleaser tendencies.

My anger over the years has dissipated as I have had understanding and have been heard.

I get angry frustrated when people don't listen or try to understand.

I share my heart and what I need.

I get keep your expectations down.

Don't be so sensitive.

When did expression of wanting to be included in a conversation become selfish or a simple hi.?

I was indirectly told that anger in Adoption is the main issue in Adoption experience and forgiveness.

When did expressing my heart about Adoption become Anger.

In my two books I relayed my story as honest and sincere and kind consideration as I could.

I have at this point come to terms with my Adoption.

I have expressed anger. Anger is healthy if it directed and expressed in a healthy manner.

I have researched Adoption issues in Adult adoptees.

It has helped me understand that what I have experienced is experienced by fellow adoptees.

The professionals are now

seeing that issues have to be addressed.

Trauma: grief, depression, abandonment issues and identity have to be addressed.

For the adoptee to heal they must grieve loss of their first family.

It is a death of their former life.

I share my heart 💖. I share from a Adoptee perspective.